human, wife, mother, bibliophile, blerd, afrofuturistic, vegan foodie, lover of curry, Brooklyn ex-pat. drinking plant-based milk since the 80's...
grown enough to post what I want.
It’s hard to discuss such issues in a Western Context because of the commercialization, and commodification of Sex, and the imposition of Romance and Romantic Love; but I’ll try.
In an individualized and materialistic culture like the one that come out of Europe and colonized the world, Sex is as distorted as all other aspect of the culture, and as toxic and destructive. The Western attitude towards sex, and how it applied to dominate women, sell us products, and shame others is all a part of the overall pathology of this culture, which corrupts and degrades all social relations and interactions.
The Western Culture is also a pendular culture that makes wild swings from one extreme to another so you will have Eras in Western Culture where sex is “free and open,” like the Greeks, or the Free Love of the 60s, then you will find eras where sex is not only highly regulated but even suppressed like in the Dark Ages and in the 40s & 50s.
You also have to understand the European and Arab Hang-ups about women, and their reproductive abilities. In these cultures you find everything from burning women at the stake by the thousands, to demonizing the very form of women.
Ultimately we are colonized by and subjected to an Insane Culture, that is particualry Insane and Confused in the realm of Sex; so we have to look at sex and relationships in this context because we are all contaminated by Western Culture, some more than others, and we have to work to distance ourselves from this Omnicidal Culture, it’s Values and Practices.
All this, and so much more needs to be understood before we I can answer your question, and have my answer understood, unfortunately I’ve only skimmed the surface, but I’ll answer anyway.
I’ll just say a quick thing about Romantic Love before I answer:
Romantic Love is the Love or concept of love imposed on us by the West. They regard the Romans, and the Roman Empire as the seed to White Dominant of the World. The Romans of course sprouted from seeds planted by the Greeks, that’s why you often hear the term ‘Greco-Roman,’ which is the same as Roman in those context.
We know that the Greeks were an bastardized imitation of African Culture, they lack the capacity to understand and practice African culture, so they just mimicked our dress, our art, our architecture, and our ways…superficially, but they also infused their mimicry with their own mentalities which gave the world not only Greek Culture, Roman Culture, but the first Western Civilizations.
So when we say Romance, or Romantic it means we are (subconsciously) paying homage to Western Culture and attempting to apply the highest Western Values to our relationships; which is something we need to move away about from, We Ain’t the Romans, so we don’t need to engage in ROMANce, and our attempts at being ROMANtic further disrupts our ability to have Revolutionary African Relationships. Purpose & Stability were high goals in African Community Bonds, not Love (which drives one to possess and control something for their own individual ends).
So I know I didn’t do service to any of the issues above, but I hope I provided some insights in on how far we’ve fallen in the realm of love and relationships, and that we need a Revolution in that arena as much as we do in the Economic, Military, and Political arenas.
Now I will answer your question: I am pro-polygamy, pro-monogamy, and pro-polyandry; as long as the familial formations are established for the ultimate purpose of functional relationships; reproduction of a people, the security and well-being of the children, the establishment and strengthening of the nation, and the perpetuation of the culture and values of the people…to name a few.
Sex is Primal, and humans being mammalian/primates will have sex, abundant sex, strange sex. I’m an adult and I accept that, and will not even fight it. Sex is primal.
When we enter the realm of Relationships and Reproduction, we have to understand that Marriage is Political, purely political; so we can’t just go off of the drive for Sex we need to bring principles, values, ideology, agendas, ect into the mix; Marriage merges families, nations, cultures, and fortunes. That’s why the most elite still arrange marriages. We have to elevate beyond our primal erges and apply our life purposes in making life-bonds.
Reproduction is Essential, not just the fertilization and birth, but the rearing, cultivating, and sustenance of the youth, and the family, the nation, and the Race. We have to be very conscious of how we come together and conduct ourselves when we begin to produce ourselves.
So it ain’t just about how you feel, what you get off on, or who and what belongs to you as an individual when you move beyond Sex into establishing a Family, and Reproducing your people.
Such Bonds are political and far from Romantic, cuz “we ain’t Romans!”
Our familiy formations need to be Revolutionary, because that is the only way to secure a future for our children, and we need to create the formations, the families, the nations that will best serve that end.
Just imagine if these Baby Mommas started to coordinate their efforts, and pool their resources. Just imagine if these Sisters started to put Revolutionary demands on the many men who desire them. Just imagine if we viewed our families as the germ seeds of Free African Nations.
I respect the wisdom of our ancestors who created family units that fed the nation, and created nations that nurtured the family unit; those families were Poly & Mono.
(I know folks will be loading their Social Media Guns to Shoot the Messenger, but hey, ask an honest question and you get an honest answer.)